When Prince Cries

First... a little help. PEOPLE OF MINNESOTA... HERE ARE THE LYRICS TO PRINCE'S SONG KISS.

Randy, Simon, Paula, and the guest judge Jewel. Paula just was not herself at all. Paula... the downer drugs don't work for me. Use uppers, okay?

I'm amazed every season how many people are offended by Simon anymore. Do they ever watch the show?? I mean, really? REALLY? Do you own a TV people? That's what Simon does, ok? That's his thing. It's like, at this point whenever anyone rips on someone it's like they're pulling "a Simon".

Urban Amish. Are you kidding me? He said he has never seen the show (or a mirror, for that matter), but if you listened to the words of his song it said something like go ahead and be mean, I know where you live... like he was digging at Simon. I'm not buying it, dude.

What about the Woody the Singing Cowboy guy? He sang Folsom Prison Blues, but he sounded more like John Wayne than Johnny Cash.

The Cowardly Lion chick? OMG. Great. Thanks. You can vibrate you uvula, and I'm sure that talent could be very helpful in some industries, but not in this one, honey. Maybe she should audition again, but this time put a Chewbacca spin on it.

American Idol and I are like BFF!!! Totally! This chick "sang" Under Pressure by Queen, but I did not recognize any of it (that's what she was supposed to be singing, right?) I know she screamed "Why" over and over to begin with. This made me scream "Why", also.

As a final note... why does everybody think they are the next American Idol because they are unique? Have any of the previous American Idols really demonstrated uniqueness? I mean, I certainly like some of our previous Idols, but I don't think I would say a single one of them is really unique.

Alright Seattle... your turn.