Thursday, April 05, 2007

What Contest in Hell did I Win??

CP responded to my blog, "Jake's Mom" when I was venting about something and saying I needed a distraction. He invited me to watch Idol and then blog with the others on this very blog. I didn't realize he just getting back at me for when I colored in the lines. Big sisters aren't very considerate of a younger siblings self confidence connected with coloring well. Sorry CP, I take it make the bad IDOL go away.

I still have hope that Melinda wins. But even that is being clouded by the Sanjaya curse. He's like that junk that forms in the inner corner of your eyes. You wipe it away but the next day it shows up again. YUCK.

Gina was far more talented. They could have taken Blake, Phil any of the others (except Melinda, Lakeisha or Gina). I hope something good comes for her from this travesty. And I hope Sanjaya ends up at Disneyland as one of the costumed performers. Mikey, Minne, Daisy(not Goofy, my husband likes him).

CP take me away...............................................

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

"It was your best performance. This is all about knowing who you are, choosing the right song. The transformation from 3-4 weeeks ago to tonight is literally chalk and cheese."
--To Gina, March 27

This show is tragic. How anyone could vote Gina out before that bushy browed non-talented shemale is beyond me!

I thought Gina really proved herself over the last few weeks. I'm pissed off...

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Valerie's View - April 3, 2007

I was at my brother's for dinner tonight and got to watch the last half of AI with my ten-year-old niece (Jenny) and 12 year-old-nephew (Jonathan).

When Chris came out, Jenny called him a, "Justin Timberlake Poser." I love it! I shortened it to JT Poser. When will he wake up and realize he's NOT JT?

I thought Gina looked good tonight. Normally her make up is a little too harsh, but her make up looked pretty (I didn't care for her hairstyle though).

Jonathan "likes" Sanjaya. I think because he wants to root for the underdog. I liked how Sanjaya danced with Paula.

While watching Haley, my sister-in-law commented that she didn't know who she (Haley) was. I told her about Simon not remembering her name a few weeks ago. Poor Haley.

I just realized I haven't commented on anyone's singing...hmmm...that in itself is a comment on this whole season.

Stony End

You know when Tony Bennett walked in the room, everyone's head turned but Melinda's because, well, you know. He seemed in pretty good shape though for a guy who's being held together with hair glue and my Dad's glasses.

As a 43 year old schlub, I know I cannot rock a pair of plaid pants the way Tony did on that album cover or the way Blake does and I'm not even sure why I'd want to. I did enjoy Blake's Mack the Knife very much even if I'm always distracted by his Muppet nose.

Dolores Hope could have breathed more life into Night & Day than Phil did. This may have been because he said he was trying to focus on his wife and to that I say 'if my wife looked like she was carved out of cream cheese, I'd keep my eye on her too'. The sweat on his head though? Very convincing.

Next up: Melinda "I've Got Rhythm But I Still Ain't Got No Neck" Doolittle! It was nice of Lakisha to lend her last week's dress but without question, Melinda was pretty awesome as always.

Chis sang a decent version of Don't Get Around Much Anymore but I hate that whole suspenders hanging off a get up look. Don't be so white trash Chris, that'll shine through on it's own. My favourite version of Don't Get Around in the film Living Out Loud. Someone does a karaoke version that Holly Hunter heckles the hell out of. Queen Latifah's in it too and does some excellent pre-Chicago singing and acting. Rent it. You'll either love it or hate me.

I disagreed with the judges completely on 'Magnet of Joy' Jordin. I love her, think she oozes charm, fun and talent but On A Clear Day made my ears bleed and I'm pretty sure I heard a couple of neighborhood dogs complaining too. Did anyone else think that was a key or two too high?

When Tony was talking about the song Smile (Charlie Chaplin wrote this? Really? Cool!), he said it's a song that gives you hope in your darkest moment. You mean like that time you were too coked up to sing at the Sands in Vegas Tony? Oh, no, you meant 9/11. Gina, I loved your version of the song except when I started to think about what that piercing would feel like on my, never mind.

Sanjaya, I think when Tony said he was a big fan, he thought you were Sanjaya Davis Jr.

I disagreed once again with the judges on Haley. She did a quite decent performance of Ain't Misbehavin' even if her new theme song should be called Give A Little Tit.

And for my last disagreement, I choose you Lakisha! I did not think that was outstanding although when you did the little skirt tug and squat, I had a good snort. What bugs me is that you ignored Tony's advice the way you ignored Lulu's advice. Advice is given to help, not to help fuck you up. Clearly, you're among the top talents. Use the force wisely.

Seabreeze out.

Top (?) 9

Annnnddd, here we go again.

Tonight's mentor is Tony Bennett. Hmmm... I have a feeling this is going to be boring. This genre of music is perfect for LaKisha and Melinda; the rest I'm not so sure about. We shall see...

Blake: He sounds like a lounge lizard -- like he should be in a hotel lounge singing to a bunch of drunk women. At least he didn't beat box to it.. just a little scatting.

I'm afraid all of these songs are going to sound like his... this isn't MY favorite genre of music so it will be hard for me to be biased.

Phil: Yawn... next

Melinda: She could sing the phone book and I'd love it. She sounded great -- the dress was horrible, but I can over look that. She is fantastic. Perfect song for her. I really wish she'd get over the "I can't believe you said that"though and REALIZE she is the BEST.

Chris: More bouncing. I think he's really a looker. It was better than Phil and Blake's fo sho. He should be safe... the girls love him.

GAWD I hate these songs!

Jordin: She has an amazing voice for a seventeen year old kid. She made the old song sound new. I was impressed with that performance. Completely impressed. That last note was AMAZING! I can see her in the top 4...

Gina: Her hair looked silly. I don't think she was in time with the music, but her voice sounded great. I was a little bit bored, but it was different for her. Something slow. Nice. I agree that she was out sung by the other two ladies. She has major competition with Melinda, Jordin and LaKisha.

Sanjaya: What's up with his hair tucked behind his ears? The stylists need to stop this crap -- or is it HIS idea? He's such a girly boy! I can't LOOK at him (is he trying to grow some facial hair?!). He is so awkward and geeky. Hated it... again.

Hayley: Dayum... her dresses get shorter every week. No wonder she is staying in this! The frat boys want her to get down to nuttin... I guess if I had legs and/or a body like hers I would wear that stuff, too! I digress. Let's talk about the song. Eh. It was OK. More personality tonight, but still not the best of the pack. She should be going home either this week or next.

LaKisha: Very cabaret. She has a beautiful voice, but tonight she hit a couple of pitchy spots. I just wan't impressed. Sorry.

Well, I still don't like this type of music. I didn't hear anything to change that. Loved Melinda (of course) and Jordin... didn't like Sanjaya and Phil's performances. Wonder who it will be? I'm through trying to guess.

Monday, April 02, 2007

AI - UK style

Watching AI in the UK is more fun that watching it at home, with the minor exception that you likely already know the results before you actually see the performances. But if you could somehow shield yourself from finding out ahead of time watching it here is superior because

a) There are no commercials, so you don't have to go through that whole "...after the break..." thing

b) The Coca-Cola logos on the judges' cups are blurred out because Coke is not a sponsor of AI's broadcast here

c) You don't have to watch that stupid part where Ryan reads the voting phone number to you like you're some kind of retard

d) You don't have to watch the contestant do that stupid grin and make the sign of their voting number with their hands. I always thought that was vote-grubbing anyway. Bad form. (Note: Melinda doesn't do that. Hint hint.)

e) You get to watch the results show right after the performances, since it doesn't air here until Sunday morning.

f) There are extra interviews with the contestant who gets kicked off, where they tell you what happened after they got kicked off. (E.g. Chris told us that Simon came up to him and said "you're going home tonight because you temporarily lost your sparkle. But you'll get it back quickly because you're a star." Awwwwwwww.)