Thursday, December 23, 2010

So, New Judges Anyone?

It's really a sad time for Idol fans because change is hard. But we all knew it was coming, right? Simon's a pretty smart guy and knows when to take the money and run. And Fox finally smelled the writing on the wall and ditched Kara. And I'm thinking that Ellen's stint was just a lark.

I'm glad they've reduced the judgery back down to three members. In my opinion, having a fourth judge is redundant, since the talent offered up can only really bring about a maximum of two reactions. There isn't enough gradation in the performances to warrant more than one or two opinions. Four judges just meant one opinion voiced three times and Simon's opinion, which is boring. Trust me. I've done the math.

Fortunately, for the sake of continuity, we still have Ryan Seacrest, the glue that holds the Titanic together. And in a nod to tradition, Randy Jackson also remains. On a side note, I'm thinking that if you look up Peter Principal in the dictionary, you'll find Randy Jackson's picture. But now we have to take a closer look at the personalities who will flank them.

Steven Tyler: Aged rock star made entirely of oak and beef jerky.

  • Has actually made a "hit record"
  • Shares a closet with Paula Abdul
  • At any given moment is probably loaded, so will bring the nonsense, Abdul-style
  • Has sold out to commercialism, so can advise contestants on how best to transfer their souls to a marketing machine with the fewest amount of ancillary fees
  • Very difficult to look at
  • Will likely bring his own ridiculous vocabulary (think: pitchy) that we'll be pummeled with as soon as one of his turns of phrase takes off
  • His presence will warrant an "Aerosmith" theme night, during which will suck mightily
 J-Lo: Talented and Bored Celebrity with Some Credibility

  • Can be charming and worked well with contestants last season
  • Has legitimate music and film experience
  • Will likely be able to put both Randy and ST in their places when necessary
  • She won't be making another album while she's on this show
  • She may be in danger of taking the role of judge/mentor too seriously and becoming a bore
Overall, it should be an interesting experiement to see if Idol can survive on its own merits or if it really was the personalities of the judgest that kept it from sinking.

What do you think?