Thursday, March 12, 2009

Never can say I'm see Jorge go home

I do feel bad for the guy because it appears he has feelings, but I really didn't want to watch him cry for the next 13 weeks. And now he is free to go practice his lecherous glare somewhere else, far away from my tv monitor.

Despite my calling Kelly C. a tramp, I do love the gal. She's put on a little poundage too and I think it's cute on her. I hate those skinny Sex in the City bitches (or SKIBS as Poor George and I call them.)

My life would SUCK without American Idol!


Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Kelly Clarkson is singing on the results show tomorrow

I miss Melinder

I'm glad to hear Kelly Clarkson will be back for the results show tomorrow. I get the impression she made herself a bit of a persona non grata by acting like an ungrateful little tramp for a few years. Maybe she's come to her senses and realized she'd be NOTHING without these people.

I still like her----but I wouldn't be doing my duty if I neglected to inform her of the error of her ways. That's what Punchmen are born to do.

So tonight's performances: gotta say, not bad, really. There are more than few good people this year. With that, a few thoughts:

-- That Gokey kid is pretty good. I hope he doesn't learn to dance; we need more JPL moments.

-- Sarver is still eligible to be my resident galoot. Until I have proof of any possible Mormonness in him, I'll remain a fan.

-- Kris Allen is kinda cute too. God, I must be in a good mood tonight. Somebody help me.

-- Oh, here we go: Jorge Nunez really bugs me. He's got the Molly Shannon crazy eyes, and I don't buy that accent for a second. He's been pouring it on more and more after what Simon said a few weeks ago. Jorge looks like a sort of lech. When he looks straight on into the camera, I feel unsettled.

-- Megan Cork-Me is one of Simon's pretty blond flash in the pans. (Anyone remember Carmen Rasmussen, the Mormon from Season Two that Simon saved with the wildcard vote even though she had less talent than Tom Arnold's retarded third cousin?) I don't know yet if Megan is a Mormon, but if she is, good for her for getting a divorce. But Jesus kids, let's stop using our children as a way to get sympathy votes. It's cheap, and so is Megan.

-- Adam Lambert: I want to sit him down and give him a crew cut. I hate that hairstyle he wears. No, I don't hate it, I abhor it. I want it dead. Liked his performance OK but I'm a bit puzzled why all four judges were lined up to blow him. I've felt that way about a few of our performers over the years, most notably Melinder Doolittle, and even then ALL the judges weren't ready to lick her privates til she glimmered and shimmered. Only Paula was.

-- Matt Giraud: I thought he was great. Who cares if he followed the bad hair guy?

-- The Blind Guy: I'm kinda over him.


Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Grand Ole Opry week

VFTW claims there is going to be a Grand Ole Opry week, and they gave a list of songs from which contestants will be asked to select theirs for performance. I've taken the liberty of selecting FOR them, as follows:

MEGAN JOY: What Was I Thinkin by Dierks Bentley
ANOOP DESAI: Folsom Prison Blues by Johnny Cash
LIL ROUNDS: Jolene by Dolly Parton
JORGE NUNEZ: Chattahoochee, by Alan Jackson
ALEXIS GRACE: Poor Poor Pitiful Me by Terry Clark
ADAM LAMBERT: Fancy by Reba McIntyre
MATT GIRARD: Honky Tonk Badonkadonk by Trace Adkins
ALLISON IRAHETA: Walkaway Joe by Trisha Yearwood
MICHAEL SARVER: If Loving You Is Wrong I Don't Want to Be Right by Barbara Mandrell
SCOTT MCINTYRE: Why'd You Come In Here Lookin' Like That by Dolly Parton
JASMINE MURRAY: Friends in Low Places by Garth Brooks
DANNY GOKEY: She Thinks I Still Care by George Jones
KRIS ALLEN: Who Cares by No one knows who you are so you'll be long gone by then