Thursday, May 10, 2007

Die or Bust

Blake Lewis is noisier than a badly made Ukranian vibrator. I want him dead. Will the gods, or just one God (preferably the white one) please rain a hail of death upon this lipless fag's head?

LaKisha leaving last night was a low point for me. I love fat, black singers. I still can't listen to Luther Vandross without crying into my pudding. But if anyone deserved the dubious award of IDOL, it was this single mother. She's so low-rent, you just know she's going back to Michigan to polish some flint.

Melinda is a flat-nosed cabaret act and Jordin Sparks is still a nose-scrunching cunt. The fact that she's from a normal family makes me hate her more than I hate Blake and his stuttering songs. He slaughtered "You Should Be Dancing." Barry Gibb should be ashamed of himself for condoning such bargain basement artistry.

I had half the episode on mute. Me love the Bee Gees, especially the dead alcoholic one.

12 comments:

Bluez628 said...

It could not be more clear that the producers are trying to engineer a Jordin Sparks win. She’s gotten to do the all-important closing number quite a few times now, hasn’t she? And the judges are, in general, being awfully kind to her.

Not that I mind Jordin -- I like her singing quite bit, and I think, as the producers probably do, that she has the most potentially marketable pop music career. Having said that, remember when this was considered a two-person race between Melinda Doolittle and LaKisha? See how at least one of the mighty has fallen.

Blake? get real....

Bluez628 said...

Oh and n.v? let me in! I can't read your blog anymore :-(

Nurse Ratchet said...

Sorry to hear about your vibrator. One more thing: It's a good idea to take your Lithium at the same time every day, ok?

Dale said...

The return of n.v. - Yay! Even though I can't not like Jordin, your name calling made me snort. And I hate to snort. It's low rent. Luther was a goddess to many!

Coaster Punchman said...

Good ole' nv, holding in her feelings as usual. I hate Jordin now the same way I hated McPhee last year.

n.v. said...

Coaster, thank you - I hate Jordin in the same way. I grew to hate McPhee for her phony baloney niceness.

n.v. said...

Blue, I couldn't agree more. It's obvious they're pushing JS the way they pushed that stinking McPhuckinWhore last season. I just hope she doesn't win. Smug amazon cunt.

Her singing is shrieky and terrible. The way she flopped her arms during the Babs song "Guilty" just fucking annoyed me. It's a right I *DROP ARMS HARD ENOUGH TO MAKE BLUBBER JIGGLE* defeeeeend? Give me a break.

n.v. said...

Blue, I added you, dear.

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Nurse, are you laughing with me, or at me? I'm not on any medication. This is called high on life, ho.

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Dale, unfortunately, I snort. Not a lot though.

Andres Carl Sena said...

fag?

N.V said...

Andres, your point?

Jake's Mom said...

Jordin may win but not a justifiable win. MeLinda has better pipes. Snort, snort, snort

Dale said...

Everything is justifiable in its own way. Even snorting.