Tuesday, March 11, 2008

CPW Idol Reviews

Loving them:

With the exception of that hideous Kansas song performance a few weeks ago, I love this girl. I think she might be a lesbian, too.

I've been all about the Cook-man for a few weeks now. I'm getting the sense he may be just slightly in love with himself in an Eddie Vedder kind of way, but he's got it.

Brookie. It's hard to resist that Mormon charm for very long. I mean, even if she really believes in the celestial undergarments, at least the girl is sincere. And sincerity always turns me on.

Over him:

Little Davie. Sure, I'd take him to the prom if I were 16, but I don't really need him as my American Idol. And Simon is right; he was a mess tonight.

Hating them:

I always think dreadlocks probably smell. Plus he lost major points with me for singing that stupid Jeff Buckley song last week; the insidiousness of religious themes in pop music always kind of gives me the heebies. And his little constipated wincing eye movement thing is making me sick. He might be a nice guy, but I want him gone. Now.

Michael Johns. Not to get all Republican about this or anything, but isn't this American Idol? Shouldn't the bylaws require some sort of naturalization process or citizenship test? And thinking about how he probably goes home and makes mad love to himself every night after the show is making me sick. Although I'll admit he wasn't that bad tonight.


n.v. said...

Punchy, I was mesmerized by Dreadlock's nostrils.

BeckEye said...

CP, if I knew where Michael lived, I would certainly go there so I could save him from having to make love to himself every night.

You are insane. And possibly blind. But it's fine, you're just less competition for me.

lulu said...

I think that Brooke girl looks like a muppet. And the dreads guy looks like David Cassidy's hippie brother.

Coaster Punchman said...

I'll never argue with you that I'm not insane, Becks. As for Johns, I would also not argue tht the guy is pretty to look at. Over dinner, great. Can he sing? Yeah, pretty well. Does pretty + can sing make you Cher? No; it takes a certain something else, and this guy ain't got it. Well, maybe Cher doesn't either, but that's beside the point.

Tenacious S said...

Last night I thought David Cook rocked. He consistently has great arrangements of his songs. I still kind of like Jason a little. Cha-queasy was kind of fun too. Of the girls, I have to say that I do like Brooke, Carly and sort of Amanda. I would be happy to see Kristy Lee and David H go home now. Buh-bye.

Bluez said...

I think if Jason sang a different song like say "Julia", he may have done a bit better, but there's something about that kid I like. Same thing with Brook. Amanda is most def gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I love David Cook. He's my fave guy. Gotta go with Carly for the gals.

Dale said...

I guess next week Mr. Cook will rock up 'The Long & Winding Road'?

michaelg said...

We often see Amanda's fiance in the audience. Is he her beard, so to speak? I would love to bring her to our team. I'm only one recruit away from the toaster oven incentive this month.

David Cook is a little to imitation Eddie for me. I liked Pearl Jam, but not a big fan of the wannabes.

Poor David Archuletta. I'm beginning to suspect that behind that cute, aw-shucks exterior lurks a bitch diva extraordinaire. It was fun to picture him stomping around backstage spitting on other contestants after that performance.