There's Something About Paula

I'm a big fan of MommaContin, so I'm sorry she won't be participating this season. It'll be interesting to see how that dynamic flies. Ellen's okay, I suppose, but her fake sunshiney happiness makes me see blood.

Should we start a Paula Petition, or something? I'm too lazy.

Hokey Gokey

Danny Gokey didn't spend last night laughing over his caterwauling performance, he spent it sucking off every single person in America! I hope it felt good for y'all!

It was heartening to see that someone had enough respect for Paula (now with fewer painkillers!) to keep the lights off so we couldn't see her lips but could still catch her flips.

What was up with Gwen Stinkfani? She's not just a girl, she's B-A-N-A-N-A-S and an even more horrifying singer than I recalled.

Thank you American Idol for reminding me that Chris Daughtry's ego is now only slightly larger than his guitar and has been taking voice lessons from pokey Gokey.

Argh.

Vote For The Best!

Please tell me that you won't vote off the best contestant ever America! Her performance last night made up most of the rest of that wasted hour.




In sadder news, are we never to see Brooke cry again? We'll always have the pout! Here she is with a few other ghosts of Idol past.

Quote of the Season

Paula to David Cook: You did something magical in your hand. Let me see it.

YAY!!!

Paula's stoned again! Dig those crazy eyes!