Friday, February 09, 2007

It's finally over

These auditions... ugh. I'm sooooo glad they are done. I'm with N.V. that I haven't been posting about them. I was all gung ho at first, taking notes and such. Then the notes stopped. Then the caring stopped. The auditions are finally done, but I'm certain I've lost a piece of my soul.

One thing I have to point out... there was the girl, Jasmine. The one that was all sad looking. Who bawled and bawled and complained when it was done. Her family had a sign. It said...

"Jasmine: Are Next American Idol"

I'm pretty sure are actually was supposed to be our. I sincerely hope our next American Idol knows the difference. I think I lost a few brain cells just reading the sign.

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Sitting Idol

I'm so fucking bored with the auditions that I couldn't bring myself to post about them. My excuse is that it's way too early to hate anyone enough. Just wait until the Hollyweird drama starts up.

I'm glad that Ash-whatever girl with the fucked up facial expressions got booted. Her nose-crinkling and top-lip-lifting jazz-bar posturing made my asshole pucker up tighter than the fist of a really cheap ethnic group.

Stay tuned.

Hey, hey... have ya heard?

Two contestants have already been "uninvited" to Hollywood because of arrest records.

Remember the singing cousins? One was denied a golden ticket and then "cursed" the judges as he left... then cousin, Akron, came in and blew them away? Yep... Akron has an arrest record for marijuana possession.

And the constipated girl, Ashlyn? The one that got the second chance? Gone. Seems she was arrested for putting sugar in her ex-boyfriends gas tank. Classy!

Two down and we haven't even made it to Hollywood yet!

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Y'all come back now...

Enjoyed Haley but could that pantsuit be any tighter? I noticed Simon enjoying it.

16 year old Baylie is a little Barbie doll with good pipes.

Did not enjoy Williams NON Amazing Grace rendition but did enjoy his cousin Akron's voice. He needs to get some expression though.

Ashlyn was good the first time, don't know why she had to do another audition but glad she made it.

My favorite for the night was the last one, Jimmy. He put feeling into audition and was happy. Happy is good.

I am not watching tonight because of my addiction to 'Lost' and David's addiction to 'Criminal Minds'...DVR can only do so much. Besides I think I've paid my dues. And I think Paula is back on the heavier medication.

Go Back to British

I love Houston! My hubby is from the northern part of that big ol' state, so I'm kinda partial to the folks in that region of the country... BUT...

Jasmine, honey, don't come into an audition showing your camel toe. No one wants to see that while being subjected to your singing! And tell your mom that Simon is British, and he comes from BRITAIN not French! Even my eight year old knows that! I don't think I have laughed that hard in a while.

This season is going to be the battle of the country folk, huh? With Bailey Brown and the other country girls, we are gonna have a hootin' hollerin' kind of competition! Bailey said she likes fashion and loves to read all them magazines, but where does she get her clothes? she is in a town with less than 1300 people! She has to shop at WalMart and we all KNOW that the fashion designers have clothes there. Her mom even stated that "she doesn't look like she lives on a farm the way she dresses".... well neither did MOM!

Loved the girl in the black outfit with the low-cut back. She needs to bring some excitement to her performance, but she was pretty good. My son, however, didn't like her because "she has a mole on her face the size of Mt. Everest".... yes, I am teaching him well.

One more night... sigh... the best of the worst... I may have to watch Beauty and the Geek. BUT, like a train wreck, I will have to look at American Idol.

(Skip: is that what you are lookin' for? giggle)

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Should we remember the Alamo?

First I was shocked by the Billy Idol wannabe, but then Paula opened her mouth. Sweet Jesus girl, what color were the pills this time?

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I liked the Bonnie Raitt girl, though I find it odd that she smiled at the most poignant part of the song where the singer admits that her lover won't feel the magic.

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Regarding the inbred girl from Krum who raises horses and bulls, I find it interesting that the judges got so excited about her because she has "commercial" written all over her, even though her voice "isn't great." Hello? What happened to looking for "originality?" Simon, you're just so banal and predictable that I might have to binge & purge just to get over this.

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I liked the cousin who could sing. If Simon should be bored of anything, it's that damn tight black t-shirt he wears every single day. Sometimes I wonder if he even washes it.

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Oh my God. Was that "Black Velvet" or a Nell impersonation?

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I thought they should have taken the Nina Simone/Michael Buble girl right away, despite the problems with the look of constipation on her face. And what is with all the tears this season?