Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Real Time Commentary with Rod Stewart!

Tonight George and I are watching and blogging our comments real-time!

Rod Stewart is the guest celebrity tonight. I'm lukewarm on him - his gravelly voice kind of annoys me, especially now that he's taken to singing standards. I think he should stick to "Maggie May." But this is not about Rod.

Rod was cute. He's a hugger. He hugged many of the contestants as he was working with them.

Chris: Sang "What a Wonderful World." He kicked ASS! This guy can sing. And he's a looker. And he's interesting. All in all, AI material. Even Simon loves him. George says: "Chris, you just raised the bar of this competition."

Paris: Sang "These Foolish Things." When she talks she sounds like Minnie Mouse. Very young. But a very nice performance tonight - Paris is back! This girl has a great voice, but she's a bit over her head in this particular group. She can use a few years of hard work and perseverance - and it will pay off. George says "she's good, but I just don't understand what the song is about."

OHMIGOD! Simon just said “Paris, you talk like Minnie Mouse.” Ok America, I swear to you now – you heard it FIRST from COASTER PUNCHMAN! I TOTALLY said that FIRST.

What scares me is that Simon & I might be psychically linked.

George says: “Paris, it was very good, in a prepubescent way.”

Taylor!: San “You Send Me.” Our favorite spaz! Which is why I now include an exclamation point(!) every time I type his name! I don’t know what it is about Taylor! That makes me want to give him a bear hug. He’s kind of like a big friendly dog. Oh my God! I was giggling out of control by the time he finished the song tonight. I LOVE TAYLOR!

George says: “Taylor! You are an out of control SPAZ! I LOVE YOU!”

Elliott: Sang “It Had to be You”. I just love Elliott so much. Even from the first moment I saw him on the screen tonight, when he was with the group of Idols waiting for Rod Stewart, singing “You’re in my heart, you’re in my soul….” He was swaying back & forth, like he was just so excited to meet Rod. I can just tell that Elliott is one of those people who just looks for the good in everything. One of those people who are happy just to be with you. One of those people I’m always thinking I should be, but invariably realize I am not. Sigh. But it’s the beauty of the diversity of our planet, n’est-ce pas?

And he’s a great singer. I want him in the final two.

Kellie: Sang “Bewitched.” You could hear her Southern twang in her singing, which I’m not sure was appropriate. OH MY GOD! She just lost her place and got ahead of the band, like by a whole measure. Simon was hanging his head.

George says: “I’m bewildered you’ve made it this far.”

Ace: Sang “I Can Only Give You Love.” Ace would be handsome if he would cut his hair. I’ve never liked long hair on guys. And tonight he had it pulled back in a very severe bun, ala Nurse Ratchett. I wish the coaches had never encouraged him to use that falsetto. It is just awful. The sad thing is, he’s better than last year’s winner. Oh God, Randy is still encouraging the falsetto. Gag me. Please. NB: I like Ace’s older brother who is in the audience every week.

George says: “Ace, I will like you much more after your operation.”

Katharine: Sang “Someone to Watch Over Me.” She would choose this song – I don’t like it. Whatever. America seems to be in love with her. I just think she’s blah. Another pretty face. Whatever.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Queen Songs

This seems a bad choice. They're hard to sing and actually not that melodic when you get right down to it. Though I will say that this group is the first group I've seen who actually might be able to handle it.

I thought the bad ones were Pickler, Paris, and Ace. I wasn't quite sure why Bucky chose "Fat-bottomed Girls", as it is such a potentially offensive song, but I think he heard the twang and thought it was a bit close to his style. And why on earth would anyone think "Bohemian Rhapsody" was even an option?

I can't wait for next week when Rod Stewart teaches them how to sing standards. Ah, the classic vocal stylings of Rod Stewart. Perhaps he'll bring Cher for a duet.

My two cents

First of all, this is extremely disturbing information about Mandisa's homophobia. We've already discussed her status as a larger girl. How dare she abandon the rules of the sisterhood? We are their beards before they can shave, and they make us feel pretty and loved until we find straight boyfriends later in life. And that bond is sacred, for the rest of our lives. I guess what appeared to be a major mistake on the part of the American people was just God working in mysterious ways, huh, Mandisa?

Now, to Elliott, Ace, and Bucky. I'm pleased Bucky went. It was time. Unfortunately now the redneck vote will focus on Pickler so we'll be stuck with her until the final four at least. This is Ace's second or third time in the bottom three, and I think that as Chris and Elliot get prettier he's going to have trouble with the heart-throb vote.

But this was Elliott's second time in the bottom three, and I fear he's next to go. I implore you in voting areas...please vote to keep him in. He is darling, and he's just such a nice kid.

Taylor is such a goofball that I think he'll hang on for awhile. People like that kookie charm.

I'm ready to commit. I want Elliott or Taylor to win.